Comedy Corner

[Quijote]

I must apologise to our forum administrators Peter and Chris for tonight's repartée with PDG. We tend to "get off topic" when the spirit is upon us. For this reason, perhaps you will tolerate such a thread as an outlet for the fun side of the forum.

So, Michael's recent joke about Descartes (Want another drink? I think not ... pfftz) : this is almost the best joke I have ever heard.

Here is my favourite joke :

Ask me "what is the essence of good humour?".

You begin, "What is the essence....."

I interject, before you finish the question : "Timing" !!!!!!!!

Any good?

[PDG]

Any good?

No.

[Quijote]

No.

Your turn, then.

[PDG]

Okay.

How do the French account for the Eiffel Tower?

[Quijote]

Okay.

How do the French account for the Eiffel Tower?

I fear this is a trick question. I don't know.

[PDG]

No trick, Phil. However, I must to bed. Will reveal all on the morrow....

[Quijote]

No trick, Phil. However, I must to bed. Will reveal all on the morrow....

Patience is not one of my virtues. Good night !

[Peter]

Sorry to be a spoil sport but no we won't - simply because we have this forum, comments and suggestions designed just for that purpose. You can engage in witty banter to your heart's content here!

[Chris]

Q: Why was the transistor disqualified from the olympics?

A: He was caught doping!

Thank you and goodnight.

[Quijote]

Q: Why was the transistor disqualified from the olympics?

A: He was caught doping!

Thank you and goodnight.

I am ashamed to say this, but I don't understand the joke ! Could you explain, please? I know it kills a joke if you need to explain it, but please, for once, help me out.

[Quijote]

PDG has failed to deliver on his promise : the Eiffel Tower ?

[Michael]

I have just pinched this joke off another website - and as it is musically oriented - it should suit this forum - although it is very mildly politically incorrect:

Stevie Wonder is playing his first gig in Tokyo and the place is absolutely packed to the rafters.

In a bid to break the ice with his new audience he asks if anyone would like him to play a request.

A little old Japanese man jumps out of his seat in the first row and shouts at the top of his voice "Play a jazz chord! Play a jazz chord!"

Amazed that this guy knows about his varied career, the blind impresario starts to play an E minor scale and then goes into a difficult jazz melody for about 10 minutes.

When he finishes the whole place goes wild.

The little old man jumps up again and shouts "No, no, play a jazz chord, play a jazz chord!".

Stevie is a bit peeved by this but being the professional that he is, dives straight into a jazz improvisation with his band around the B flat minor chord and really tears the place apart.

The crowd goes wild with this impromptu show of his technical expertise.

The little old man jumps up again. "No, no! Play a jazz chord, play a jazz chord!".

Stevie is staring to get really annoyed now as the man doesn't seem to appreciate his playing ability.

Stevie shouts to him from the stage, "OK smart ass. You get up here and do it!"

The little old man climbs up onto the stage, takes hold of the microphone and starts to sing...

"A jazz chord, to say, I ruv you!"

[Quijote]

Michael : took me while to get that one, but I got there. Can you explain Chris's joke to me?

[Quijote]

Whilst on the Japanese 'theme' :

Japanese tourist in London, very annoyed at the daily changes in the Yen-Pound Sterling exchange rate :

Japanese tourist, to bank cashier : "Why evvy time I come here the rate different?"
Bank cashier : "Fluctuation."
Japanese tourist : "Fluck you too, European!"

[Michael]

Good one, Philip, but I think you might need a degree in computing to understand the joke Chris posted (I don't anyway) but I wish PDG would explain about the bloody Eifell Tower????
I know he has gone to bed but how much sleep does he need?????